My first graduate seminar: I remember it well. The professor was revered in the field of communication, and I was excited/nervous (same feeling, different perspectives).
Our desks were arranged in a circle. ("So grown-up!" I thought.) We were introduced to Watzlawick's five axioms of communication and asked to debate the first:
One cannot not communicate.
Wait, what?
I had never thought of that before. (Plus it's a double negative and that threw me for a moment.)
The notion is that regardless of intention, people communicate as soon as they perceive each other.
We simply can't help ourselves!
Even when sitting alone, minding our own business, we are always communicating something to others once someone is around to take note, like it or not.
Think of it: Your coworker is attentive in the Zoom meeting, but her face is expressionless. What is she communicating? Is she listening? Is she bored? Is she over the virtual meetings? All of the above? Is it something else entirely?
Does she even mean to be communicating anything? It doesn't matter because, in the presence of others, she's sending messages, whether she knows it or not.
We are a sense-making species. We are constantly trying to interpret stimuli.
So what do we do with this communication nugget?
We become more aware of the messages we might be sending and we clarify.
This sounds like: "I know I raised my voice in that conversation, but it was because I am passionate about this project, not because I am upset."
And we become less sure of the messages we are interpreting and check our perceptions before we carve them in stone.
This sounds like: "It sounded to me like you were yelling. Is everything okay?"
So back to the question:
Q: Is this thing on?
A: Apparently, yes. Always.
