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| I see you! I really do! |
In the previous post (#54) I shared my favorite recognition story: the time when the director of HR met me to say how much the company appreciated me. Wow. I love that example of leadership.
Today's post is my other favorite recognition story: the time when I recognized others for being fabulous.
Pull up a chair, pour some tea, and relax. It's a long, but worthwhile story.
First, some background.
I ❤️ recognizing others. I love spotting the good, calling it out and making people feel seen.
I've been known to ask to see the manager (not because I have short hair!) just so I can rave about their employees.
I end many customer service calls with, "Who can I tell about your great service?"
I get joy from finding the right way to let others in my circle of influence know that I see their contributions and think they are awesome.
This specific recognition story goes back to a time when I was an adjunct instructor at a Cal State University.
I was teaching a class called Argumentation and Advocacy. It was a tough class with a large presentation requirement. At the end of the semester students were paired to debate two sides of a controversial issue, specifically citing all claims, warrants and evidence. All of that while strutting their presentation skills.
One semester I had a *magical* class of students. It was a dream class. (Anyone who has taught knows what I'm saying!)
The students were dedicated, inquisitive, prepared and courageous. They gelled with each other and with me. They were the section that I always looked forward to seeing. Just the chance of getting a group like them kept me teaching in the college classroom for 20 years.
These students kept me on my toes; they asked great questions and expected a lot from me. I tried my best to meet their needs by preparing particularly good lectures and activities.
The university I taught for had some weird requirements. For example, instructors would get warnings if they issued too many A's (!!) and all classes- no matter what the subject-- were required to have a formal final exam.
I didn't like these rules.
Students earned their A's in my classes and I did everything I could to help them do so. Final exams didn't always measure knowledge or skill, and I thought they should be up to the discretion of the instructor.
Still, I'm a rule-follower and I did my best to oblige.
Except the time I didn't.
And that takes us back to that amazing group of students.
For the weeks prior to the big semester-end debate, they came to class early to clarify concepts with me. They stayed late to rehearse their arguments. And on top of all that brain-work, they practiced their public speaking skills: They wanted to sound credible and competent.
When debate-day came, they slayed it! I was in awe. The students absolutely nailed their presentations. They demonstrated a keen knowledge of argumentation, coupled with solid public speaking skills.
Next came the mandatory multiple-choice final. By my design, it wasn't a huge part of their final grade, but it could move the needle either way for those on the low or high side of a percentile.
I couldn't do it.
They'd already met the objectives of the class. What would a multiple-choice test prove?
Not much for this group.
Still, I had to give the final -- it was university policy, and my department held us accountable.
So I prepared the exam. It had twenty-five carefully crafted questions. I distributed a study guide for the exam and watched as study-groups formed. I left time for exam prep and answered clarification questions for students.
They were ready for the test!
And still, I just couldn't.
So... when it was time to print that exam, I deliberately typed an *asterisk* in front of each correct answer before running it through the copier. For example, if the answer was B, that B would look like this: *B. If they were paying attention, the answers were right in front of them. Literally.
Finally we joined for our last meeting of the semester. Before entering the classroom, many students occupied the hall and quizzed each other on the study guide for the course final.
When all were seated, I distributed the exam (the one with all of the correct answers marked with asterisks).
With a solid poker-face, I told students that the copier was acting up and that there were ink spots on the exam. I apologized and passed out the spotty papers.
Five minutes into the final, a student in the class approached my desk. He whispered that he thought I had mistakenly given him the answer key. I stayed in character and reassured him it was just the crappy copier. Confused, he returned to his desk.
Shortly after that, students began to look around at each other, shrugging and eventually smiling.
When the last exam was turned in I told the students that they had worked hard this semester and I didn't think an exam would prove whether or not they knew the course material. Instead, they had demonstrated their comprehension in their excellent presentations.They had also shown me how seriously they took their studies by preparing whole-heartedly for the final. From my perspective, they exceeded my expectations. As long as everyone had turned in their exam, they aced it.**
They were thrilled. (All except for the one young woman who seemed to gage her worth by exam scores). Some high-fived me when they exited. One told me I was awesome. 😎
I felt great!
And while that's a nice side-effect, it was never about me.
It was about noticing other's fabulousness and recognizing it in a way that mattered to them.
That's recognition. It's more than a thank you. It's finding a way to show others you appreciate them.
My story is just one example of many, many ways to recognize others.
Here’s the takeaway: While we can’t always break the rules, one way to recognize others is by clearing their path. Make sure that we are not giving people unnecessary hoops to jump through. Help them measure their success with metrics that matter.
**That doesn't mean everyone got As for the final course grade. Many did, but for some reason I didn't get reprimanded for it. ;)
But wait! There are a few more posts on recognition!
- This one shares the time I was recognized when things went wrong... and it meant more than ever.
- This one honors the Platinum Rule and offers tips for matching the recognition to the recipient so it lands well.
- This one give fresh ideas for recognizing others (beyond a coffee card or mug!)
The comment feature isn't working, but I'd still love to have a conversation! Email me at 53thingsIthinkIknow@gmail.com
Telescope Image by Hans Braxmeier from Pixabay
