Head Tilt #8: Climbing the Learning Ladder

Imagine that you are forced to give a speech in front of an audience of unknown individuals...

Worse yet, they have been told to judge you...

Even worse yet, you are going to get a grade for your speech.

And THAT is the predicament that many of my students at San Jose State University and Cabrillo College faced because Public Speaking, the course I taught for 20 years, was a pre-requisite for graduating. They had to take it. 

(Insert genuine empathy for anyone who's endured this!)

One of my primary goals, other than to help them find their voice, was to help them exhale and relax, truly! My syllabus or email correspondence always said, "This will be better than you think!" 

By the end of the semester, I heard that many of my students agreed that it was. 😊

On day one, after the inevitably awkward introductions and mandatory review of assignments, I told them about the Conscious Competence Ladder that was developed by Gordon Training International waaaayyyy back in the 70s, before most of them were born.

The ladder considers two factors of skill building: awareness (consciousness) and skill level (competence). And even though I get tongue-tied every time I talk about it out loud, it's still relevant today for anyone learning a new skill, whether it be public speaking, golfing, networking, or anything else in which you can improve. 

Today I'll stick with the skill of public speaking. Suppose you give presentations often at work and want to get better at speaking in front of your team.

Let's start with Level 1: Unconscious Incompetence:

    In this stage, we are unaware (unconscious) of where we are inept (incompetent). For example, you think you did a fairly good job on your prezi but when you casually ask for some feedback, your colleague tells you that you said "um" a lot. Like, 63 times a lot. 

DANG! 

Welcome to Level 2: Conscious Incompetence:

    In your next presentation in front of the team you say um often, but thanks to your colleague's call-out, you are aware of your mistakes. You are conscious of your incompetence. You might not want to say "um" but it's so habitual that it just comes out whenever you pause or search for the next word. During the speech you might even blurt out, "I said UM!" 

Hang on, it gets better.

Next is Level 3: Conscious Competence:

    In this stage you've practiced your speech several times and have really tried to eliminate or at least reduce the ums since you know they detract from your message. You can feel the um creeping right to the tip of your tongue BUT you do not let it pass through your lips. You are very aware that you are not saying um. You are consciously competent. 

*Progress!*

Finally, there's Level 4: Unconscious Competence:

    Congratulations! With practice, feedback and commitment, you rarely utter um anymore! As a matter of fact, you don't even think about it. It's just how you speak, um-free. Look at you go! 

(And then that colleague calls you out on your over-crowded PowerPoint slides... and BAM! you're back to Level 2 for a whole different skill...)

We don't typically hear about a skill and simply embody it — it takes practice! And we are not always linear in our progression. While we aim for Level 4, sometimes we hover in level 3, sometimes slipping back to level 2. 

The take away: Be patient with yourself (and others) when learning new skills.  It's a process. Level one requires feedback for development.  Someone needs to let you know where you could grow. Ask others how you might improve in the skill you desire.

Level 2 needs information. In this stage you are aware and you need to know how to improve. Consult with experts, research and mentors. 

Moving to level 3 demands effort. You practice, practice and practice until you get it right. It's not quite natural yet, but it will be! Be patient with yourself and remind yourself of the goal. 

Finally, Level 4, unconscious competence, is when you have mastered the skill. This merits celebration. Yay you! I knew you could do it!



Photo by Pille Kirsi from Pexels





Head Tilt #7: Mourn, mine and move on

A few months ago I coached a client who was transitioning into a new career. 

She started the call close to tears. 

She was being forced out of her current job (COVID, restructuring, etc.) and needed to search for a new one. The business of her soon-to-be former employer was what she knew. The processes were familiar. She was comfortable with her co-workers. A peek at her office would likely find the company logo on a hat, jacket, and travel mug. And even though it wasn't always perfect, her job defined her professionally for over a decade. She thought she'd retire there, to be honest.

No wonder she was emotional about leaving. 

We sat in silence for a while before proceeding with our session. 

I told her it was okay to mourn this loss, and I think she was grateful for the safe space. 

This was only the first step of our coaching session, though. Often when clients are facing work transitions, I walk them through my 3 M's for change.

Mourn.

Mine.

Move on. 

We can apply these 3 M's to any major professional transition, particularly when the change isn't our choice.

1. MOURN

We mourn loss by allowing ourselves to feel discomfort, defensiveness, disappointment, grief, sadness, anger, or whatever other feelings might arise when we traverse loss. (They won't just go away because we ignore them.) 

Talk it out with a trusted friend, counselor, or coach. Get it out by writing in a journal.  Work it out with physical exertion. (I'm a fan of hitting stuff). We can even dance it out-- One of my sisters, for example, swears that moving to any track by Nine Inch Nails is great for releasing anger. She's right, of course. ;) Likely our morning period is a combination of many things. 

The point is that we need to acknowledge the emotional difficulty of change instead of ignoring it, and only then we can find our path through it. 

2. MINE

Next, we put on our metaphorical yellow hard hats and mine the experience for lessons we can carry forward. We search for diamonds, gold, or any other treasures: positive and negative. What did we learn from the place, period, or person we are leaving? What are our strengths? Where can we grow? Don a cloak of humility and seek feedback before leaving, or thoughtfully review feedback that has accumulated over time. Mine with a learner's mindset instead of defense. Examone data with a flashlight, not a hammer. Yes, we can do this. Because we want to get better and it's just like us to do so. 

3. MOVE ON

Once we have acknowledged our discomfort with change and collected valuable lessons, we move on. We don't burn bridges. Not us! We move on with gratitude, professionalism, realistic optimism, and the belief that everything happens for a reason-- even if we aren't sure of that reason just yet. 

So. Much. Easier. Said.Than. Done. 

But as my favorite Peloton instructor, Robin Arzon, says:

No challenge, no change.

Change is inevitable. Let's change for the better.  

Me, working through something!




Head Tilt #6: Apple pie, Pumpkin pie, Job pie?

I can't help myself-- I had to post about pie on Pi Day (3.14). And if you've never tried a job pie, I highly recommend it! This team activity is perfect for alignment, time management, clarity, and engagement.

I adapted this from consultants at Korn Ferry. Leaders at my favorite berry company, Driscoll's, have been doing this activity with their global teams for years-- with great results!

So simple. So valuable.

So, how are you spending your time?

1. On a pie chart, map your day-to-day work activities and responsibilities. To begin, look at your calendar from the past month for a record of activities. Next, draw a circle (or open up Excel) and create a pie chart with different sections representing time spent. 

For example, if you spend roughly 40% of your day on customer outreach and sales, make a "sales slice" that is a little less than half of the circle. If you spend 25% of your time in meetings, get more specific and look at the content of these meetings. Are most of your meetings around strategy? Employee development? Something that other people find important? Map it accordingly. Less important than exact percentages is the general gist of how you're spending your time. Be as objective and honest as possible. Once completed, this chart represents your real job pie. 

        Full disclosure: My job pie always has a small wedge called "looking for stuff."

2. Take a closer look. Would you order this pie in an employment restaurant? 

  •     Which activities and/or categories are most motivating/satisfying to you?
  •     Which activities are less motivating/satisfying?
  •     Ideally, what do you need to expand, contract, or eliminate in order to be more successful at work?

3. Now it's time to create your Ideal Job Pie, a visual representation of how you would ideally be spending your time at work. Suggestion: If you're in a leadership position, make sure to include wedges for professional development and leading your team.


4. Finally, compare your two job pies, the real and the ideal.

Ideally, which activities or responsibilities would you release (to free up more time to focus on higher priorities or areas of engagement), protect (because they are essential to your job or bring you satisfaction), and/or add (in order to increase job effectiveness and satisfaction) so your ideal pie becomes a reality?

The only way to move closer to your ideal job pie is by making small shifts and changes.  

I recommend doing this on your own first and then encouraging your team to draft and share theirs as well. It's not only a great way to drive engagement but is also a fun method for clarity and alignment when workgroups get to see what each other is doing and how they'd like to grow. 

I have a lot of job-pie success stories to share if interested, as well as a one-pager on how to take this to your teams. Drop a question or comment below.  


Image by WikimediaImages from Pixabay 








Head Tilt #5: "Michelle, you have leukemia."

Twenty-four years ago on March 13, the oncologist called me on the phone to tell me I had leukemia. 

 My world turned upside down.

The rest of that year would be riddled with shots, transfusions, chemotherapy, wigs, and trips to the ER. 

That year was also colored by so much love, laughter, hope, prayer, sunrises, sunsets, dog kisses, and joy.  

Whenever I am asked how I became who I am today, I always think about that experience. While I still hate cancer and wouldn't wish it on anyone, I loved the way I showed up during my dance with the diagnosis. 

I was more positive.

I said "I love you" more often.

I cut out a lot of the BS.

I noticed the things that I'd so often ignored (Hello, Sunrise!) 

I appreciated this great gift of being alive.

I let go of the things that didn't matter and embraced those that did. 

For me, the most challenging part of surviving cancer is living those lessons without a life-threatening illness staring me in the face. Sometimes I fall back into old patterns, but when I am mindful I look at the world through the lens of love and gratitude. 

The way I show up is always a choice, no matter what the circumstance. 

Photo by Hernan Pauccara from Pexels