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| That's right-- I'm scited! |
Big race coming up in San Diego... (3/27)
Mentally I go through my checklist:
✅ Have I trained enough? (I think so? I guess I could always train more.)
✅ Have I done enough hill work? (Hmmm... too late now if I haven't!)
✅ Did I plan my taper-week right? (Sure! I love an excuse to take it slow and eat a few more carbs.)
✅ Do I have the right gear: socks, shoes, etc? (Absolutely yes on this one!)
✅ Do I have my hydration tabs? (Another yes)
✅ Do I have the right playlist? (Still might add a song or two...)
I am ready! I am also scited.
Scited means the state of being scared and excited at the same time. It's a portmanteau created by the wonderful human, Glennon Doyle.
And I am scited when I think about the race.
I am excited about the thrill of racing. It's so much FUN! The amped energy of the racers is exhilarating! I am also eager to see what my body is capable of this year.
I am scared that I didn't prepare enough after all. I am scared I won't finish in a time that I consider respectable. What if I bonk?!
Here's the thing: Anxiety (being scared) is a state of negative arousal. Excitement is nearly the same exact experience physically, but it's a state of positive arousal.
I first heard this from Tony Robbins at his Unleash the Power Within conference and it blew my mind. 🤯 Shortly after, I tested the idea. My son and I were in line for The Twilight Zone Hollywood Tower of Terror -- a 130ft elevator drop ride in Disney California Adventure. At the time, it was my son's favorite ride and my least favorite. It was so scary!!! Even my butterflies were biting their nails when I stood in that queue.
I committed long ago never to be a sideline mom, so despite my anxiety, I agreed to ride it with him each time we visited the park.
As we waited our turn, I started thinking about anxiety and excitement as the same thing, different perspective.
I thought how fun it was to be with Brendan. I thought how safe I was (despite the ruse of a broken elevator) and what a thrill the ride was. I actually talked myself into a different state of mind.
Did I still have butterflies? Oh yeah! An entire parade of butterflies do-si-doed in my belly!
But now I was much more excited and much less scared.
I've used the same mind game with the anxiety I feel before a big presentation or interview. I can feel the butterflies, but I let them lift me.
As for the race, my scared parts are real, but they aren't as loud as the excited parts.
My mind is reading the pre-race jitters as information and then turning it into fuel.
I might bonk (doubtful). I might not finish in the time I want (could happen), but I am dressing this particular parade of butterflies in the best damn outfits I can imagine.
Now they are all doing high-kicks in unison while cheering me on.
I think they'll help me fly come Sunday morning.
On my mark.
Get set.
GO!