Head Tilt #82: PREP: The Goldilocks method for answering questions

I am sure the three bears had many questions for Goldilocks. 

I have a question for you...

Are you good at answering questions on the spot?

 

By good, can you answer the question in a polished yet succinct way that is easy for others to understand?

Do you know how much of an answer is too little, too much, or just right?

 

Consider these scenarios:

 

 

Scenario #1: Too much

In a board meeting, a board member asked a department VP for justification on a budget increase request. The VP’s answer, though accurate and understandable to him, was verbose and filled with technical jargon. The board member was visibly frustrated and curtly asked the VP to “bottom line it.”

 

Ouch.

 

Scenario #2: Too little

In a virtual training, colleagues from the Human Resources department energetically debated the effectiveness of employee engagement surveys. When one quieter team member was asked her opinion, she said, “They just don’t work.” Probed for more information, she quipped, “They are a waste of our time and the employee’s time.” She retreated to her quiet disposition, and the meeting continued.

 

Uh-Oh.

 

Scenario #3: Just right

In an interview, a candidate was asked which company value she identified with the most. She paused for a second and then answered,

 

“Innovation. Because I thrive on creativity and fresh perspectives, I resonate most with your company's commitment to innovation. For example, I’ve read about your brainstorming sessions where people from different levels and departments come together as a diverse think-tank of sorts. I would love to be a part of a company that not only talks about innovating but also creates situations for it to thrive.”  

 

            NAILED IT!

 

I’ve coached all three people in the scenarios above to use the PREP framework to answer questions. It's simple and widely used (i.e., it’s been around for years) and allows

 

PREP is the Goldilocks of responses ☀️

 

Point:         Lead with your bottom line.

Reason:     Give a reason or two to support your point.

Example:   Be specific with an example that expands upon your point and/or reason.

Point:         Restate your point.

 

The person in Scenario #3 did just that.

 

Question: With which of our company values do you identify?

Answer:

Point: Innovation.

Reason:  Because I thrive on creativity and fresh perspectives, I resonate most with your company’s commitment to innovation.

Example: For example, I’ve read about your brainstorming sessions where people from different levels and departments come together as a diverse think-tank.

Point: I would love to be a part of a company that not only talks about innovating but also creates situations for innovation to thrive.” 

 

Now, the one who is asking the question, in this case, the interviewer, can ask more questions based on that answer.

 

When asked the budget question again, the VP could say something like,

Point: We are seeking a budget increase of $XXX, which can look daunting at first glance.

Reason: Still, the plans we have to update and improve will make X Y Z more efficient and ultimately save the company money in the long run. 

Example: So and so is working on _______ to ____ and needs ______.

Point: A budget increase of XXX will ensure our success.

 

And then, board members can ask for elaboration or clarification on this answer.

 

If asked to participate in a conversation she has an opinion on but doesn’t know how to articulate it, the team member can say,

 

Point: No, I don’t think the engagement surveys work.

Reason: Employees have complained that not only are they a waste of time to complete, but they don’t see any changes happening as a result.

Example: In 2022's survey, scores were low, and at the end of 2023, they were even lower, despite all our efforts.

Point: I think there is a better way to measure and increase engagement, but I am not sure what it is.

 

From there, team members can ask questions or piggyback on her answers.

 

P-R-E-P

Point-Reason-Example-Point

As with any communication tip, use it as a handrail, not handcuffs. For example, sometimes the reason and example conflate, making the acronym PEP.

 

Try it and let me know if you get the budget increase, are recognized for your thoughtful contributions to the conversation, or get the job! 😉

 

Head Tilt #90: Baby Steps

My daughter, Macy, taking
baby steps on the beach in 2002 💕    

Lately, I've been using the term "baby steps" with my clients and myself. 

As I coach leaders to adopt new practices, you might catch me saying something like, "Take baby steps... it doesn't have to happen all at once. Small sculpts matter."

Or, as I try to take strides toward my goals, no matter how challenging, I remind myself that "baby steps count." 

(Case in point: On a tough day, I recently labeled getting out of bed, changing my sheets, and feeding the dogs as baby steps. I mean, at least I didn't hide under the covers like I wanted to! Look at me go! 😆)

The phrase baby steps has become synonymous with forward micro-movements. We use it gracefully to remind ourselves and others that it's not just the long leaps that propel us toward results. The small acts are significant, too.

Good stuff. ☀️

But then I started thinking about actual baby steps. 

You see, as a mother of two and someone who's been around plenty of babies, I can attest that they rarely take tiny steps, and surely not ever just one--- even when learning.

Instead, babies take clumsy, sloppy steps -- some big, some small. Finding their balance and stride, they take a step forward... or to the left... or to the right... and sometimes even backward! 

Oh, and they fall on their tushes a lot! 

But they get up and try again. And again. And again, until those baby steps take them to where they want to go. Onward to walking, skipping, jumping, and running. 

And if they're more coordinated than I am, cartwheels may be on the horizon. 🎉

All because they didn't give up when things felt awkward or tough. 

It's not the step size; the commitment makes the difference.

Another interesting thing I noticed when I searched for an image of baby steps is that there's always someone spotting them. Someone is there to help them up, catch them if they fall, or cheer them on. 

I was already okay with the metaphorical meaning of baby steps, but now I feel a bit of pride in taking more of them and encouraging others to do the same. Progress is different for everyone. My progress is often messy. Sometimes, I get bruises from falling down. But I get up. I know my goal. I take baby steps forward-- with or without grace-- I keep going, all with the support of some amazing friends and colleagues.

No matter how small, big, or messy, take pride in your baby steps. Keep going! If you fall-- get back right back up. You got this! 👣 

The comment feature isn't working, but I'd still love to have a conversation! Email me at 53thingsIthinkIknow@gmail.com

The Divorce Post: Gotta get bad before it gets good

Metaphorical Me

Note to anyone who stumbles upon this: Often, I process my feelings best through writing. This is one of those times. Not a head-tilt, not a lesson, just what's going on for me right now. I hope some might relate. 

I recently made a major life change. 

I finally filed for divorce from my partner of 29 years. Even though we’ve been separated for nine tumultuous months, it was the toughest decision I've ever made. Ever.

As much as I know that it was the right thing to do, right now

It
Is

Simply
So
Hard.

Right now, I am like a skydiver who chose to jump out of a plane.

You see, they're in a free fall for about 50 seconds after the jump.

In those 50 seconds, as exhilarated as they are that they finally made the courageous choice to jump,

I bet they are also frightened.

Will they find the ripcord?

Will the parachute work?

AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

Right now, that's me. 

I made an informed, mindful, albeit difficult, choice.

I jumped out of a metaphorical plane. 

Not by whim, yet out of necessity.

And now I'm in a free fall.

Scared. Panicking. Wondering if I'll crash.

No. 

Not me.  

Soon, I'll find the ripcord, pull it, and my parachute will help me glide toward what’s possible and what’s next. Even better, maybe I'll find my wings. 

Until then, I honor all my feelings of fear and uncertainty because, eyes wide open, I chose this, and I trust my decision.

I am continuously growing and learning through this change.

If you, too, have made a significant change, accept that it will be hard for a bit.

A dear friend of mine said it's like jumping off a moving train: You'll roll a few times before you find your balance and stand on your feet.

Plane or train

Free fall or roll

It gets better.

Hang on.

Sometimes, it's gotta get bad before it gets good.

But it's going to get good.

So very good!

Onward. ☀️

Head Tilt #89: Now Hiring: Security Guards

Would you hire yourself as the security guard for your own well-being?

In a world of career changes and upskilling, I encourage us all to add the role of Security Guard to our personal résumés.

A quick search of top requirements for great security guards revealed commonalities such as

• Observation skills  
• Communication skills
• Fitness
• Team Player

What if we pledge to become our own security guards, fiercely committed to protecting our energy and mental wellness?

To hone observation skills, we prioritize vigilance. We stay alert, not paranoid, and scan for risks to our well-being, external or self-imposed. We thoughtfully discern the severity of any irregularities and respond accordingly. Is there a meeting coming up where one participant consistently disregards our input? We commit to putting distance between that stimulus and our response, thus decreasing the impact of the trigger. How about that one friend who always talks but never listens? Maybe we pass on the next suggestion to get together. Did we stay up too late watching Black Mirror? We acknowledge the impact that choice has on our mood and plan a restorative break.

To embolden our communication skills, we become masters of awareness and assertiveness. While respecting ourselves and others, we speak up to set boundaries and speak up again if they’re ignored. We commit to practicing empathy. We know when and how to de-escalate situations that throw us off balance. We pair mindfulness with kindness and choose the best communication we are capable of, especially in tricky situations. We are kindful.

To escalate our physical fitness levels, we honor our need for sleep, nutrition, and movement. We create evening rituals that get us to bed on time and limit screen time. We feed our bodies well (pass the blueberries, kefir, and leafy greens, please!) and say no thank you more often to sugar and alcohol. We say yes to movement that makes us smile, whether that be lifting, running, skipping, or twirling. We catapult the quality of our mental fitness by nourishing our minds with meditation and positive inputs like podcasts and music. We guard against negative inputs like mindless scrolling and needless social media comparisons. Our inner bouncer never lets our inner critic seize the microphone. We passionately protect our fabulous selves.

Finally, though security guards appear to work alone, they are always part of a bigger team. We enhance our team player skills by surrounding ourselves with good people who also protect their well-being. We nurture these relationships, playing the roles of teacher and student as needed—their wellness matters to us. We listen to them when they notice we are off track, and we offer to sub when they can’t fill their own shift.  We thrive together in a community of compassionate, kind people.

Would you hire yourself as a security guard for your own well-being?

I might still be an apprentice, but I am on my way to getting the job.

Join me? ☀️